Between all the innocent, and not so innocent interactions between a guy and a girl nothing beats the Boob Graze. The boob graze is (if you don't already know) when a girl accidentally rubs her boob against an odd part of your body...like your shoulder....or your back. The thing that makes the boob graze special is that it is non threatening enough so it can keep on happening, and just the right amount of dirty to bring a smirk on any guys' face. And what can a guy do? it's not our fault...it's nature's fault because it equipped women with this clumsy marvelous things called breasts that keep rubbing on your shoulder, back, forearm or an ear (trust me...its happened).
Now, what's not cool are the guys that abuse the wonder of the boob graze. How can you abuse the boob graze you ask? why, by creating these scenarios where you keep on grazing the boob(s) of a hot chick almost every day by "accident"...yeah right. These Boob Grazer Posers...or Pseudo Grazers are just perverts in sheep's clothing...and they totally miss the point of the boob graze. What makes the boob graze so wonderful is that it happens by accident , it's so random it may happen; but it may not happen...it's much like eating a chocolate and when you're midway through it you find out it has delicious cream filling. Seriously it is the randomness of it that makes it hot...and the fact that the girl also knows she just grazed your back, arm, shoulder or the top of your head with her boob(s) but she's kinda afraid to mention it...and i guess she would get all defensive and would rationalize it as "well, what the hell can i do if these missiles are in the way?"...as i said...innocent;but with just the right amount of naughty
On a closing note: All you Pseudo Grazers should get a punishment fitting for your horrible HORRIBLE crime, and that would be, to be in the same room with the guy that is a Pseudo penis grazer...that is (if you don't already know) the guy that would find any excuse to graze his penis on some girl's back, shoulder or the top of her head...only to find out that the second time that this guy grazes you he's as hard as the iceberg that sunk the titanic...ooh better yet he's as hard as a diamond drill...with the iceberg that sunk the titanic on top...anyways that should be a great punishment.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Office Politiks
Sometimes you say all you want to say and if you're wise (usually...on most occasions im NOT) when you said your pice you shut up. Leave them wanting more. Talking and writing feels more like being a snake charmer, if you're good people will follow the sound (or the words, or the typed letters) if you fuck up...amazingly people will react like the snake and bite you in the ass...anyways i had reached a point where i had written enough. Another point of view...and a valid one is life got uninteresting...up until recently.
It never ceases to amaze me that everywhere you go there are a set of rules...society has rules, your home has rules, a MMORPG has rules and the group inside the MMORPG has rules...your job has rules. But rules aren't enough...to survive you have to use the politics. To survive everywhere; but more importantly your job. People will say all that matters is doing your job right, at the end of the day the people will notice. That's not true...if you dont play the intrigues and the politics someone will take your job and give it to the one person that is playing the game.
Even getting a job is a matter of politics...your resume isn't enough to even get your feet on the door. Ask anyone how they got their recent job, or the promotion and in most cases they will tell you someone that knows someone in upper management put the word in. Hell, to get my current job i had to kiss ass and more ass to get a miserable part-time.
My boss in a recent encounter with her feminist side has decided to burn the bra and in a holier than thou attitude told me women aren't as affected by office politiks as men (she says this of course because i had a disagreement with a co-worker, and it has turned into a delicious game of who said what?) but based on MY recent studies i have come to the conclusion that men and women play the office politics in a different way.
Men approach work as who does what better, who landed the fisher account (american psycho) or who sells the most, or...who is most dependable, once the role of alpha male is filled all the other guys will stare stupidly and worship their leader. Women...it's a whole different story...women are more sophisticated in their efforts, it's a longer proccess, but the payoff is BIG. women will cause the tides to shift, one day they will tell everyone who to adore, just so the next day they can be torn down. They will build intrigues, telling you who's sleeping with who, or who said what about you during lunch. They will create rifts and watch as it unfolds from afar and their involvement is never suspect. And we wonder how come the lioness is the better hunter of the felines...i bet you she applies the same tactics.
It's a fact, to stay a long time at your work you not only have to work well, be dependable and seem trodden down...kinda like life has run you over...but you have to play politics, but if you're gonna play them...be the best. Play both sides, competitive and devious at the same time. NEVER, EVER argue with your boss (unless you're fairly sure that your boss is an idiot, or you have all your bases covered). NEVER EVER talk smack about the most pupular guy at work (at least not at the beginning). NEVER EVER let people know what you really think about this or that. That way they will tell you what they think and if they try to play you you already are like 100 steps ahead.
Those are simple steps, after that is up to you. I hate the fact that i have to play these silly games to get ahead, that my work is not enough to get what i want, but hey...i did not write the rules and i sure as hell can't change them, so might as well do what everyone else does.
It never ceases to amaze me that everywhere you go there are a set of rules...society has rules, your home has rules, a MMORPG has rules and the group inside the MMORPG has rules...your job has rules. But rules aren't enough...to survive you have to use the politics. To survive everywhere; but more importantly your job. People will say all that matters is doing your job right, at the end of the day the people will notice. That's not true...if you dont play the intrigues and the politics someone will take your job and give it to the one person that is playing the game.
Even getting a job is a matter of politics...your resume isn't enough to even get your feet on the door. Ask anyone how they got their recent job, or the promotion and in most cases they will tell you someone that knows someone in upper management put the word in. Hell, to get my current job i had to kiss ass and more ass to get a miserable part-time.
My boss in a recent encounter with her feminist side has decided to burn the bra and in a holier than thou attitude told me women aren't as affected by office politiks as men (she says this of course because i had a disagreement with a co-worker, and it has turned into a delicious game of who said what?) but based on MY recent studies i have come to the conclusion that men and women play the office politics in a different way.
Men approach work as who does what better, who landed the fisher account (american psycho) or who sells the most, or...who is most dependable, once the role of alpha male is filled all the other guys will stare stupidly and worship their leader. Women...it's a whole different story...women are more sophisticated in their efforts, it's a longer proccess, but the payoff is BIG. women will cause the tides to shift, one day they will tell everyone who to adore, just so the next day they can be torn down. They will build intrigues, telling you who's sleeping with who, or who said what about you during lunch. They will create rifts and watch as it unfolds from afar and their involvement is never suspect. And we wonder how come the lioness is the better hunter of the felines...i bet you she applies the same tactics.
It's a fact, to stay a long time at your work you not only have to work well, be dependable and seem trodden down...kinda like life has run you over...but you have to play politics, but if you're gonna play them...be the best. Play both sides, competitive and devious at the same time. NEVER, EVER argue with your boss (unless you're fairly sure that your boss is an idiot, or you have all your bases covered). NEVER EVER talk smack about the most pupular guy at work (at least not at the beginning). NEVER EVER let people know what you really think about this or that. That way they will tell you what they think and if they try to play you you already are like 100 steps ahead.
Those are simple steps, after that is up to you. I hate the fact that i have to play these silly games to get ahead, that my work is not enough to get what i want, but hey...i did not write the rules and i sure as hell can't change them, so might as well do what everyone else does.
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